Family, kids, Lifestyle, Parenting, Relationships

It’s Not Easy to Send Your First Child to School All Day…

To the moms who have their first child going to school all day.

And Then They Decide To Grow

My son he went to school all day,

He’s excited to be in first grade.

As he walked to greet his teacher, he looked back at me and waved.

I smiled, I waved, I showed him a brave face…

But inside I wasn’t ok.

First day of 1st grade!

My worries, concerns, and stressors took over, and I wanted to stay with him all day.

Would he have someone to sit by at lunch?

At recess would others make sure to include them in their play?

Would he listen and understand all that he needs to?

I just want to make sure he’s ok.

All day long I kept busy, taking care of the two little ones home, but my mind was on my sweet son.

The realization of my anxieties hit me hard… I knew I wasn’t there to protect him.

All his life, until now, I have been the one to protect and guard him most the day.

I was always there for him when he needed me.

Now, I hope he has learned enough on his own… as I send him on his way alone.

I miss that time with my son.

6 years old

Even though I’m so glad he’s learning and growing…

The realization and truth is, this is just the beginning of the growth.

Now he goes to school all day… and time tends to tick quicker.

I know deep down these years will press on… faster and faster everyday.

It is my first glimpse of watching my son grow and be independent… and yet, sad because I loved all of our time spent together.

So yes a little piece of my heart goes with my boy as he leaves for school, I miss being able to be there for him and watch over him,

And yet… he’s doing great and having fun.. I’m so glad he’s enjoying school.

It’s hard for us moms to experience big changes.

The emotions are raw and real.

These kids of ours, they are our world.

And we send them to school, to learn, grow, and achieve.

And one day, they will spread their wings, and fly so that they can create that positive change in the world.

If only they knew what a mamas heart goes through.

And still, we moms are grateful and thankful for their growth.

These children truly are the future.

And these moms will forever be their biggest fans.

xoxo,

Christy Lee

Baby, Family, kids, Lifestyle, Parenting, Relationships

Why Do I Forget to do This With My Cute Little Kids?

Many of you are on summer break like we are.

I have three little ones at home around the clock, age 5, 4 and 1.

I love being at home with my kids, I am so grateful to be home with my kids.

And yet, there are somedays when it can be a really, loooong day with these cute kids.

Why?

They get grumpy, fight with each other, are picky eaters, make messes, and so forth….

Cade, Taya & Makell with Dad

Well, today while I was down in the basement, I saw some Jenga blocks that we hadn’t played with for months.

I grabbed the blocks and took them upstairs for the kids to play with.

Usually I am trying to clean or fold laundry or do something productive while the kids are playing nicely.

But it just felt nice to sit and play blocks with them.

And guess what? We all played with these block for a good 40 minutes without a big fight or issue.

We all had fun!
Moral of the story?

Play with your kids!

unrecognizable barefoot kid playing jenga at home
Photo by Ketut Subiyanto on Pexels.com

We all know, but easily forget, that the dishes and laundry can wait.

Every single day, our children are growing bigger and older.

The time truly sneaks by, and I know we will all cherish the memories of playing with our kids.

Until Next Time!

xoxo,

Christy Lee

Uncategorized

Do You Ever Want a “Re-Do” When It Comes To Parenting Moments?

Parenting is amazing, and yet parenting is hard.

I had a moment this morning with my little girl, that made me reflect on parenting.

Rewind a bit.

I am reading Brene Browns book “Daring Greatly” and I love it and highly recommend it.

If you haven’t read this book, it goes into detail about “Shame” and how detrimental “shame” is for many people.

Keeping that in mind…..

I was reading about SHAME last night and I was pondering many moments of parenting in which I was worried I had “shamed” my kids in detrimental ways.

One specific concern is with my 4 year old daughter who HATES to go to the bathroom.

Yes, she has been potty trained for over a year, but she is not a fan of going to the bathroom.

I usually have to bribe her, or walk her into the bathroom, she just doesn’t do it very willingly or independently, and it has definitely tested my patience.

My sweet girl

Well, this morning I had asked her my normal half a dozen times to go to the bathroom.

She hadn’t gone yet, and when it hit emergency mode she needed my help because she was wearing a long nightgown that she needed me to hold.

This cute little 4 year old was right in front of the toilet but she didn’t make it.

I sat there holding her nightgown up as she went to the bathroom all over my master bathroom floor…(palm to face).

Without thinking, I started to scream for a minute and as soon as I did my cute little 4 year old started saying “sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!!”

I immediately gathered my emotions together.

I stopped yelling and freaking out.

On the inside I was very frustrated but I knew that I had TWO choices.

As a parent I could “shame” her and make her feel terrible and guilty even though she already knew she had made a mistake.

OR

I could be patient, make this little incident a teaching moment, and move on…because the reality is, she’s only 4 years old and bless her heart she’s trying.

Was is easy to stop myself from getting boiling mad and upset?!

No. You’re talking to the germaphobe here so cleaning up toilet issues is not my thing.

However, I love my sweet girl.

My sweet girl in her nightgown I had to help her with

She is learning everyday, and guess what, so am I.

As a mother, I make my mistakes too and I can’t expect my young, sweet 4 year old to do everything perfectly.

It’s hard to not REACT, somehow that’s what I usually turn to.

However, I am learning if we choose LOVE over all the other options, things will be better.

Yes I have probably scarred my kids in some ways already.

No parent is perfect.

Parenting is truly a moment-to-moment basis…where if we can just react with love through all the moments, our kids will know that we love them, despite some of the mistakes they make along the way.

I truly believe I was meant to read about “Shame” last night so that I could handle this mornings situation better than normal.

Will I make mistakes as I continue on the parenting journey?

Sure, it’s natural.

And yet, as long as our focus is love, and if we are truly trying to “not-scar” our children, things will work out.

We can’t “Re-do” all our parenting moments.

And yet, we can sure a lot from each moment with our kids. And we can try to do better with each situation that comes.

Moral of the story?

close up of tree against sky
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Treat your kids with love and respect despite their weaknesses. Discipline them when necessary, but as long as our kids know that we love them know matter what, our kids will feel safe, happy and will grow.

Parenting is a beautiful, hard, amazing and difficult job all wrapped in one, and oh how blessed we are to have our beautiful children in our lives.

xoxo,

Christy Lee

Baby, Family, kids, Lifestyle, Parenting, Relationships

Motherhood unfiltered – a moment that was priceless

For everyone in those years of motherhood where all the children are cute and young, adorable but very dependent … today was a day!

Fatigue settles in and I had high hopes of taking a nap while my two little ones napped hoping my older son would play with some toys or draw a picture…. something, anything.

Just as I was getting my son situated to not need me for a bit… my baby woke up, her nap was over and now my chance to rest was gone.

This is not the first time this has happened so I’ve told myself to never get my “heart -set” on taking a nap… and yet it’s hard to keep going when energy levels are low.

But we do keep going because we are moms and we know that’s what our family needs us to do right?

Baby girl with her fancy sunglasses

Well we had some errands to run and I promised the kids a vanilla ice cream come from McDonalds after errands.

Baby girl who is 16 months had her first ice cream cone and she was messier than ever but loved it so much!

I took baby girl out of the car seat and sat down by her, eye level, to clean her face.

I meant to say “give mommy a lick,” because the ice cream looked tasty and it was dripping everywhere… but instead I said “give mommy kiss.”

Well that little cutie puckered up her ice cream face and went in for the biggest kiss and love.

And then when I asked for another kiss she walked away and was too busy.

It literally melted my heart because the kiss came unexpectedly and so quick, but it was so genuine and sweet.

That little kiss from baby girl reminded me that these little ones may be precious to us, but we are so precious to them.

My 2 sweet girls

Our kids love us and show us small acts of endearment throughout the day, if we can just focus on seeing the love.

That little surprise kiss today was the best “pick me up,” and I forgot about how tired I had felt.

When my oldest climbs in for cuddles … my heart melts

I’ve heard it said a million times, but right when we think we as parents are teaching our kids all the important things in life… it’s truly the children that have been teaching us all along.

Xoxo,

Christy Lee

Family, kids, Lifestyle, Parenting

9 Tips For Helping Your Kids With Homework -From a Former Teacher

Did you know I taught school for seven years before I had my kids?

I taught seventh grade history and eight grade health…and I loved it!

Switch gears to having my own kids, I have found that doing homework with your own kids, is similar to teaching in the classroom.

Here are some tips that may help you out at home.

  • Be near them but don’t hover. Kids need their freedom to do work on their own. I always stay in the same room, and help my child understand the concept, however, when my child gets to work on their homework I don’t stand over them the entire time –so that my child feels that they are able to accomplish on their own.

  • Praise, Praise, and Praise. Even if your child does something wrong on their homework assignment, correct them, but correct tactfully and find something to praise them with. Such as “we need to re-do this, but your handwriting looks great there.” It’s amazing how much confidence or lack of confidence comes from school work and when we stay positive with the childs learning abilities, it not only motivates the child to work harder, but it reminds them that even if they make a mistake they are capable, intelligent people.
  • Be willing to give your child breaks while working on homework. We all know it’s idea to sit down and get an assignment completed. However, for some kids, having breaks while doing homework keeps a positive environment. Yes it takes a bit more patience for the parents, but if the child benefits from breaks, give them some time to complete the assignment.

-Make a point to stay near the child that’s doing homework, and yet work on something yourself. Again, it’s hard not to hover .. and it’s good to keep them on track … but if they can see that you are THERE and PRESENT if they need help that’s great. Even more, if they see that you are cooking or writing in your journal close by… this might create an opportunity for your child to work to solve homework problems in their own .. which is a great thing. As the parent, stay productive yourself while the child is working on homework close by you.

Put away the phones : Parents and the child doing homework should have their phones’ sound turned off and the phones should be away from the parent and child so as to not cause major distractions.

Serve up some snacks. Sometimes it’s a bit more enjoyable to get through homework with some snacks to munch on. These snacks shouldn’t be sugary and unhealthy treats.. but more so, some food that’s healthy and tasty to the child.

My son enjoys snacking on popcorn or crackers during homework time.

-Be consistent with setting a homework routine. Kids crave routines and truly work extremely better when there is an expected routine in place. Find a designated time and area of the house to do homework and be as consistent as possible.

-Have your child teach you. As a former teacher myself, I found that I learned more from teaching than I ever did in college. Why? Because when you teach a topic or subject you truly have to know and understand the topic and be an expert in that area. Having your child teach you—the parent, a concept they have learned can be a positive way to enhance the child’s confidence. Also, having the child teach the parent can help the child understand topics and subjects at a much deeper level.

-Make homework fun! Now I’m not saying you have to blast music, but as the parent, have a smile on your phase, make sure your tone of voice is positive and cheerful. Most of all, if we as parents are encouraging and positive .. your child can enjoy their time doing homework, versus dreading homework time. Attitude is everything when it comes to homework.

Baby, Family, kids, Lifestyle, Relationships

What I do know about Parenting

Let’s be honest, there is A LOT that I don’t know about parenting.

Even when three young kids, somedays I roam the parenting life oblivious to what I should be doing.

However, I always remind myself that the things I DO KNOW about parenting, help me get through all that I don’t know.

My sweet little family. ❤️

So let’s start with what I don’t know about parenting.

What I don’t know about parenting is how to get all of my kids to sleep through the night, in their beds, period. We have tried the books and the help and we still end up with one…sometimes two kids in our bed.

Our kids are young…5 years, 3 years, and 1 year old.

We had a big earthquake here back in March and I can honestly say my three year old daughter has never slept the same since then.

So I admit, I don’t know how to get my kids to sleep well through the night.

I also don’t know how to deal with the different emotions and personalities that each child has.

All three of my kids are very different from each other, and they respond to discipline, love, and all things differently.

It’s a learning curve, maybe one day I will figure it out, but not right now.

Reading time with dad❤️

What I don’t know about parenting is how to get my kids to eat every meal without a fight, or without having to fix a separate side meal for some of my kids.

I have picky eaters, and I don’t know how to make them like certain foods.

Is it possible to make kids like certain foods?

I don’t know that.

What I don’t know about parenting is how to make sure I am meeting all of my children’s emotional needs.

There is no sign or signal that let’s us know if we are helping our children emotionally to the capacity that they each need. Is it possible to know that?

What I don’t know about parenting is how to be a kind, patient mom when trying to get kids packed into the van to get to school on time.

I am sure some parents have this figured out, but I don’t. I can bribe kids…that way I am not raising my voice as much, but I’m not sure that quite counts?

What I don’t know about parenting is …a continual thing.

However ….

What I DO KNOW about parenting is that the love a parent has for a child is indescribable.

And if we as parents can transfer that LOVE into every interaction we have with our kids….

Then we have EVERY part of parenting figured out.

Our cute kids playing together with smiles ❤️

We won’t have all the answers … raising children takes me to my knees a lot, asking Heavenly Father what I can do to be a better parent.

And what I feel from Heavenly Father is LOVE— and that is always the answer.

Love your kids through everything.

Love them through the tantrums and the heartache.

Love your kids through successes and honors…

If we love our kids through every decision and every move they make … they will FEEL that love in their hearts.

I felt it from mine.

That love will carry your children through all the pain and all the happiness.

So when it’s hard to know just how to discipline or work through a disagreement with your child.. stop and think of how your actions show love?

Love will change the world, one child at a time.

It starts with how we parent. When we parent with LOVE as the goal everyday… our children will benefit through indescribable ways.

That’s the only thing I know about parenting …that loving our kids through thick and thin is the key.

And guess what?

As long as that’s all we know… To love our children unconditionally … it all works out in the end.

Good luck parents!

You got this:)

xoxo,

Christy Lee

Family, Lifestyle, Parenting, Relationships

A Favorite Quote About Children ….

Me and my sweet girl

I think there are no truer words when it comes to parenting.

I felt this love and continue to feel this deep-rooted love from my parents.

As a parent myself now, I hope my sweet children can sense this love from my husband and me.

Such a beautiful quote, and a wonderful reminder to shower our children with love.

Xoxo,

Christy Lee

Family, kids, Lifestyle

Motherhood Unfiltered Part 1.

This is a series of post that I will continue to add to because, well, it’s a HUGE part of who I am and there are so many thoughts that can go into this topic.

Motherhood unfiltered.

We live in a society of filters.

We live where something that looks amazing and beautiful … isn’t valid because it’s been manipulated in a way —in which it looses its raw identity.

Motherhood has been filtered and I want to talk about the unfiltered.

Motherhood is hard and beautiful all rolled into one.

There are moments of beauty and peace, and moments of anxiety and turmoil.

Motherhood is not easy, it is hands down the HARDEST thing I myself have ever done, and yet it is the best thing I’ve ever done as well.

Found moms blue eyeshadow.

Within a thirty minute time period, my emotions travel from happy, to sad, to excited, and mad, to laughing, to crying and on and on.

The mental exhaustion is the test of motherhood. And yet, with that comes some of the most precious moments that will ever occur in life.

Those precious moments of “I love you,” or “mommy you’re my favorite,” watching your children light up when you come home from a night out..those are the precious moments that are truly priceless.

So yes motherhood is amazing and hard —and don’t be fooled by the pictures on social media that everyone has it “figured out” better than you.

Just remember motherhood is an incredible journey …it will always have ups and downs but in end .. it will be worth the wonderful ride.

xoxo,

Christy Lee

Baby, Family, Lifestyle

True Life Parenting: Expectation vs. Reality

Again with throwing out ALL the expectations, parenting fits into this as well.

Didn’t we all have those dreams and ideas of how parenting would be?

And it’s not necessarily that our dreams are taken out completely, but when it comes to the “reality” of parenting…our dreams of parenting change.

Basically, until you become parents you seem to have an idea in mind as to how it will be to raise your children.

Then—you see reality, and sometimes the only thing you can do is laugh and know that all is well, nothing is perfect including “parenthood.”

Having expectations just puts more pressure on parenting which stops you from enjoying all the moments.

Here is a list of EXPECTATION VS. REALITY in our current parenting life.

-Expectaion: I will never allow my child to throw crazy, spoiled and spontaneous tantrums because they will know that my parenting style does not allow it.

Reality: My children ALL have moments of crazy and monumental tantrums and I have no control over most of them. In fact, I have learned the better way to handle it is to walk away and not “REACT,” say a prayer, and then try my very HARDEST to talk to them gently about their poor behavior and set a consequence.

Expectation: My children will eat very healthy.

Reality: If my kids have a “taste” of a fruit and a veggie a day, I am ecstatic!

Expectation: My child will be wise beyond their years. As a former school teacher I will do all I can to have my children reading and writing and learning advanced academics before kindergarten.

Reality: My son specifically does not enjoy learning from me–his mother. I have to gear up to try my very best to get him to do ONE line of a new letter. He can write his name but sometimes forgets a letter. And you know what? I am completely satisfied because I know he is smart and will do just fine if he isn’t the very top of his class in kindergarten. He learns on his own time in his own way.

Baby girl in her onesie!

Expectation: My children will not go out in public unless they are fully clothed and groomed properly.

Reality: My baby wears just a onesie most of the time, I am happy to get out the door with me carrying some shoes for the kids, and if they have some attire on, life is good—matching clothes has been thrown out the window! Having hair done is a bonus!

Expectation: I will have a wonderful and delicious home-cooked meal for my entire family to enjoy six days a week.

Reality: My son rarely eats what the rest of us do so I start feeling like a short order chef and often get overwhelmed by the idea of what to cook for dinner.

Expectation: As a mother I will always look my best — hair, makeup and cute clothes on.

My kids recent pictures July 2020

Reality: My go-to outfit is a t shirt and sweats, a headband and a pony tail often grace my hair, and if I get a full face of makeup on —I’m extremely lucky!

Expectation: majority of my house will be clean and my kids will have set jobs to help keep the house clean.

Reality: my house has toys everywhere and at the end of the day, my kids do the basics to help clean, but they are still a bit little to help with all the household chores. So, yes my house is not the tidiest these days , and that’s ok.

My littles happily playing with toys and making a mess.

The list goes on but I just have to say … I write this to remind all of you that life doesn’t go as planned.. whether in your parenting life, work life, or whatever it may be.

It’s ok if you’re “expectations” aren’t your reality.

Should you stop creating goals and expectations ?

Nope?

Should you give yourself some grace ?

Yes.

And can I tell you something more…

I am very happy with my reality in our parenting life, it’s ok with me because at the end of the day… our little family is happy and healthy.

So before you get worried about all the “expectations” you aren’t living up to… remember that you’re not alone.

Give yourself a break.

Enjoy the little moments of your cute kids, it goes oh so fast!

xoxo,

Christy Lee